Wednesday, November 30, 2005

T.O. -- you can be an ass if you can run?

My son thinks Mr. Owens can be as cocky as he is 'cause he's good on the field.


IMHO, that kind of reasoning allows for greater misbehavior. Like: he couldn't possibly be a murderer; he was such a great football player. . .

Guidance & inspiration

Some of the things I don't agree with, but several of the articles have been so what I needed to know/learn for whatever was going on at a particular moment in my life, that it's uncanny.

Go here and sign up for some guidance and inspiration DailyOM

It's official

I will be reading in Washington, D.C. Sept. 25, 2006

cool cool cool

Two more stories published

At some point today, a new online mag called "Per Contra" will go live and two of my flashes will be in it.
I'll link it when it's available.

I don't want a boyfriend

"You're like twenty or something?" this guy asked me yesterday.

I laughed. "Nah, I'm more like 44."

"You're kidding? Damn , girl, you look good!"

I smiled.

"You married?"


"You have a boyfriend?"


"You want a boyfriend?" he asked.

I shrugged. "Don't know," I said. Conversation ended.

A lot of information has been coming my way, articles about intention and manifestation and one thing I have to be clear on is what I want. I thought about that guy's question and I don't know if he meant a boyfriend in general or him in particular, but I know that I don't want a boyfriend, or at least I wouldn't want that to become the status quo.

I want a man I can commit to, a man I will submit to. A man who inspires me to honor, respect and obey (yes, I did say that) him.

I always said I didn't want a husband. (I declined one proposal and with the other guy, well, I found it was easier/quicker/smarter to just return the dress and cancel the appt. for blood tests).

But I'm a different person, a better woman, now, and I do want a husband. I do. I do. I do.

Rod Stewart and Mick Jagger should quit the business

--the baby-making one.

I mean, really, should your GRANDCHILDREN and CHILDREN be playmates????

Tuesday, November 29, 2005

I LOVE Pandas

The new cub, Tai Shan, is just too cute.

(I've heard that pandas are more closely related to raccoons than bears and there's one called "The Lesser Panda" that can walk on two feet, paws,whatever, and it's thinner than the black/white one, but, as always, I digress. . . )

Go here Panda info

Except, he's gay



cross him off the list


Monday, November 28, 2005


So I was messing around with the blog --changing the template and all--'cause I've got to waste 1/2 hour and now I understand what that notice was about losing customizing -- all of my links are gone!!!!!!!!!!!

Uhm, Susan. . . .HELP!

Do I have to tell you all of this??

A former professor came into the restaurant. I couldn't recall his name, so I asked him. When he told me, I said, "That's right; I was close, but now I remember."

"You must be a former student," he said.

"Yep," I told him.

The woman with him then said, "Well, you evidently didn't go into broadcasting." She didn't forget to add that nice condescending tone.


Why do people think that some don't exercise choice? That I can choose to work at a restaurant because it fits what I'm doing with my life at the moment.

My reply to her was, "No, actually I went into print and when I was tired of newswriting, I taught and then I decided that I wanted to be a writer and I'm working here while I work on a novel because an agent in New York is interested in it."


Another woman asked if I was a college student because some of the employees are and she was trying to recall which ones. I told her "no" and she gave me this look that clearly said that I was going nowhere with my life.

Uh, excuse me.

Do you need to know that I've already graduated from college with two degrees and with honors and I was recognized for my academic success with a scholarship and several awards and damn it I was such a smart cookie that when my friends were whining about the 12 or 14 hours they were taking, I was acing 21 and 22 credit hours semesters. And no I didn't have all those children until I went to GRADUATE school where my thesis was so compelling that when I wrote an expert in the field for information, he asked me to send him a copy of it so he could use my work in his courses.

Just because I work at a restaurant doesn't mean I have no ambition or dreams.

I hate when people try to define me without taking the time to try and get to know me.


So I think I've scored another reading for 2006; in Washington, D.C. So, that leaves 9 months to cover.

A guy I met at the Miami reading hosts a reading series in Atlanta, so I'll be writing him.(He did say he liked my reading style so. . . .)

and to follow up on that Miami Book Fair lead. . . .

I'm addicted

to the computer game "Bookworm." I found a tourney site where you can play the game for money-- pretend or real. So I signed up to play using pretend dollars and I won about $45 which I used to continue playing and playing. (You're fronted some bucks to play and then you can use your pretend winnings to play on).
I got a message after awhile that I was too skilled a player and if I wanted to play anymore, I'd have to play with REAL money, paypal or credit card accepted.


If only I had real money.


-- the movie. Have you seen it yet?

That and "Walk The Line" are my must see's.

I love

watching the leaves fall from the tree branches and then shuffling through the piles of them on the lawn and the street.

So that's how I spent part of this morning:)

Sunday, November 27, 2005

The Most Intriguing (and Sensual) Male Poets 2006

March is looking like my favorite month.

yummy calendar

Buy Susan's new book

Do you like wild and funny and sexy writing?

Then buy any of Susan DiPlacido's books plus she's got a new one ---"Mutual Holdings"---available in days.

Go here:
Mutual Holdings

Yay Susan!


I threw the stack of old NY Times away.

NY Times 100 Notable Books of the Year-- I've read not one

Fiction & Poetry

BEYOND BLACK. By Hilary Mantel. (John Macrae/Holt, $26.)

A CHANGED MAN. By Francine Prose. (HarperCollins, $24.95.)

COLLECTED POEMS, 1943-2004. By Richard Wilbur. (Harcourt, $35.)

EMPIRE RISING. By Thomas Kelly. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $25.)

ENVY. By Kathryn Harrison. (Random House, $24.95.)

EUROPE CENTRAL. By William T. Vollmann. (Viking, $39.95.)

FOLLIES: New Stories. By Ann Beattie. (Scribner, $25.)

HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE. By J. K. Rowling. Illustrated by Mary GrandPré. (Arthur A. Levine/ Scholastic, $29.99.)

HOME LAND. By Sam Lipsyte. (Picador, paper, $13.)

THE HOT KID. By Elmore Leonard. (Morrow, $25.95.)

HOW WE ARE HUNGRY: Stories. By Dave Eggers. (McSweeney's, $22.)

IN CASE WE'RE SEPARATED: Connected Stories. By Alice Mattison. (Morrow/HarperCollins, $23.95.)

INDECISION. By Benjamin Kunkel. (Random House, $21.95.)

KAFKA ON THE SHORE. By Haruki Murakami. (Knopf, $25.95.)

LUNAR PARK. By Bret Easton Ellis. (Knopf, $25.)

MAPS FOR LOST LOVERS. By Nadeem Aslam. (Knopf, $25.)

THE MARCH. By E. L. Doctorow. (Random House, $25.95.)

MEMORIES OF MY MELANCHOLY WHORES. By Gabriel García Márquez. (Knopf, $20.)

MIGRATION: New and Selected Poems. By W. S. Merwin. (Copper Canyon, $40.)

MISSING MOM. By Joyce Carol Oates. (Ecco/ HarperCollins, $25.95.)

MISSION TO AMERICA. By Walter Kirn. (Doubleday, $23.95.)

MOTHER'S MILK. By Edward St. Aubyn. (Open City, $23.)

NATURAL HISTORY: Poems. By Dan Chiasson. (Knopf, $23.)

NEVER LET ME GO. By Kazuo Ishiguro. (Knopf, $24.)

NO COUNTRY FOR OLD MEN. By Cormac McCarthy. (Knopf, $24.95.)

ON BEAUTY. Zadie Smith. (Penguin Press, $25.95.)

OVERLORD: Poems. By Jorie Graham. (Ecco/HarperCollins, $22.95.)

THE PAINTED DRUM. By Louise Erdrich. (HarperCollins, $25.95.)

PLEASE DON'T COME BACK FROM THE MOON. By Dean Bakopoulos. (Harcourt, $23.)

PREP. By Curtis Sittenfeld. (Random House, $21.95.)

SATURDAY. By Ian McEwan. (Nan A. Talese/Doubleday, $26.)

THE SEA. By John Banville. (Knopf, $23.)

SEVEN TYPES OF AMBIGUITY. By Elliot Perlman. (Riverhead, $27.95.)

SHALIMAR THE CLOWN. By Salman Rushdie. (Random House, $25.95.)

SLOW MAN. By J. M. Coetzee. (Viking, $24.95.)

STAR DUST. Frank Bidart. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $20.)

THE SUCCESSOR. By Ismail Kadare. (Arcade, $24.)

TOWELHEAD. By Alicia Erian. (Simon & Schuster, $22.)

VERONICA. By Mary Gaitskill. (Pantheon, $23.)


THE ACCIDENTAL MASTERPIECE: On the Art of Life and Vice Versa. By Michael Kimmelman. (Penguin Press, $24.95.)

AHMAD'S WAR, AHMAD'S PEACE: Surviving Under Saddam, Dying in the New Iraq. By Michael Goldfarb. (Carroll & Graf, $25.95.)

AMERICAN PROMETHEUS: The Triumph and Tragedy of J. Robert Oppenheimer. By Kai Bird and Martin J. Sherwin. (Knopf, $35.)

ARE MEN NECESSARY? When Sexes Collide. By Maureen Dowd. (Putnam, $25.95.)

ARMAGEDDON: The Battle for Germany, 1944-1945. By Max Hastings. (Knopf, $30.)

THE ASSASSINS' GATE: America in Iraq. By George Packer. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $26.)

THE BEATLES: The Biography. By Bob Spitz. (Little, Brown, $29.95.) S

BECOMING JUSTICE BLACKMUN: Harry Blackmun's Supreme Court Journey. By Linda Greenhouse. (Times Books/Holt, $25.)

BEYOND GLORY: Joe Louis vs. Max Schmeling, and a World on the Brink. By David Margolick. (Knopf, $26.95.)

BOSS TWEED: The Rise and Fall of the Corrupt Pol Who Conceived the Soul of Modern New York. By Kenneth D. Ackerman. (Carroll & Graf, $27.)

BREAK, BLOW, BURN. By Camille Paglia. (Pantheon, $20.)

BURY THE CHAINS: Prophets and Rebels in the Fight to Free an Empire's Slaves. By Adam Hochschild. (Houghton Mifflin, $26.95.)

COLLAPSE: How Societies Choose to Fail or Succeed. By Jared Diamond. (Viking, $29.95.)

CONSPIRACY OF FOOLS: A True Story. By Kurt Eichenwald. (Broadway, $26.)

DE KOONING: An American Master. By Mark Stevens and Annalyn Swan. (Knopf, $35.)

DREAM BOOGIE: The Triumph of Sam Cooke. By Peter Guralnick. (Little, Brown, $27.95.)

ELIA KAZAN: A Biography. By Richard Schickel. (HarperCollins. $29.95.)

AN END TO SUFFERING: The Buddha in the World. By Pankaj Mishra. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $25.)

1491: New Revelations of the Americas Before Columbus. By Charles C. Mann. (Knopf, $30.)

FREAKONOMICS: A Rogue Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything. By Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner. (Morrow, $25.95.)

GARBAGE LAND: On the Secret Trail of Trash. By Elizabeth Royte. (Little, Brown, $24.95.)

THE GLASS CASTLE: A Memoir. By Jeannette Walls. (Scribner, $25.)

A GREAT IMPROVISATION: Franklin, France, and the Birth of America. By Stacy Schiff. (Holt, $30.)

IN COMMAND OF HISTORY: Churchill Fighting and Writing the Second World War. By David Reynolds. (Random House, $35.)

JEAN-JACQUES ROUSSEAU: Restless Genius. By Leo Damrosch. (Houghton Mifflin, $30.)

JOHN KENNETH GALBRAITH: His Life, His Politics, His Economics. By Richard Parker. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $35.)

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THE BRONX IS BURNING: 1977, Baseball, Politics, and the Battle for the Soul of a City. By Jonathan Mahler. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $25.)

THE LETTERS OF ROBERT LOWELL. Edited by Saskia Hamilton. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $40.)

LINCOLN'S MELANCHOLY. By Joshua Wolf Shenk. (Houghton Mifflin, $25.)

THE LOST PAINTING. By Jonathan Harr. (Random House, $24.95.)

MADE IN DETROIT: A South of 8-Mile Memoir. By Paul Clemens. (Doubleday, $23.95.)

MAO: The Unknown Story. By Jung Chang and Jon Halliday. (Knopf, $35.)

MARK TWAIN: A Life. By Ron Powers. (Free Press, $35.)

MATISSE THE MASTER: A Life of Henri Matisse. The Conquest of Color, 1909-1954. By Hilary Spurling. (Knopf, $40.)

MIRROR TO AMERICA: The Autobiography of John Hope Franklin. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $25.)

NEW ART CITY. By Jed Perl. (Knopf, $35.)

NIGHT DRAWS NEAR: Iraq's People in the Shadow of America's War. By Anthony Shadid. (Holt, $26.)

OH THE GLORY OF IT ALL. By Sean Wilsey. (Penguin Press, $25.95.)

OMAHA BLUES: A Memory Loop. By Joseph Lelyveld. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $22.)

102 MINUTES: The Untold Story of the Fight to Survive Inside the Twin Towers. By Jim Dwyer and Kevin Flynn. (Times Books/Holt, $26.)

THE ORIENTALIST: Solving the Mystery of a Strange and Dangerous Life. By Tom Reiss. (Random House, $25.95.)

OUR INNER APE: A Leading Primatologist Explains Why We Are Who We Are. By Frans de Waal. (Riverhead, $24.95.)

POSTWAR: A History of Europe Since 1945. By Tony Judt. (Penguin Press, $39.95.)

THE PRINCE OF THE CITY: Giuliani, New York and the Genius of American Life. By Fred Siegel with Harry Siegel. (Encounter, $26.95.)

THE RISE OF AMERICAN DEMOCRACY: Jefferson to Lincoln. By Sean Wilentz. (Norton, $35.)

THE RIVER OF DOUBT: Theodore Roosevelt's Darkest Journey. By Candice Millard. (Doubleday, $26.)

1776. By David McCullough. (Simon & Schuster, $32.)

SPOOK: Science Tackles the Afterlife. By Mary Roach. (Norton, $24.95.)

THE SURVIVOR. By John F. Harris. (Random House, $29.95.) An assessment of Bill Clinton's performance in the White House; by a reporter for The Washington Post.

A TALE OF LOVE AND DARKNESS. By Amos Oz. (Harcourt, $26.)

TEAM OF RIVALS: The Political Genius of Abraham Lincoln. By Doris Kearns Goodwin. (Simon & Schuster, $35.)

THE TENDER BAR: A Memoir. By J. R. Moehringer. (Hyperion, $23.95.)

THEATRE OF FISH: Travels Through Newfoundland and Labrador. By John Gimlette. (Knopf, $25.)

TULIA: Race, Cocaine, and Corruption in a Small Texas Town. By Nate Blakeslee. (PublicAffairs, $26.95.)

VINDICATION: A Life of Mary Wollstonecraft. By Lyndall Gordon. (HarperCollins, $29.95.)

A WAR LIKE NO OTHER: How the Athenians and Spartans Fought the Peloponnesian War. By Victor Davis Hanson. (Random House, $29.95.)

WARPED PASSAGES: Unraveling the Mysteries of the Universe's Hidden Dimensions. By Lisa Randall. (Ecco/HarperCollins, $27.95.)

WITHOUT APOLOGY: Girls, Women, and the Desire to Fight. By Leah Hager Cohen. (Random House, $24.95.)

WODEHOUSE: A Life. By Robert McCrum. (Norton, $27.95.)

THE WORLD IS FLAT: A Brief History of the Twenty-First Century. By Thomas L. Friedman. (Farrar, Straus & Giroux, $27.50.)

THE YEAR OF MAGICAL THINKING. By Joan Didion. (Knopf, $23.95.)

A poem

I am your lover, come to my side, I will open the gate to your love.

Come settle with me, let us be neighbors to the stars.

You have been hiding so long, endlessly drifting in the sea of my love.

Even so, you have always been connected to me.

Concealed, revealed, in the unknown, in the un-manifest.

I am life itself. You have been a prisoner of a little pond,

I am the ocean and its turbulent flood. Come merge with me,

leave this world of ignorance. Be with me, I will open the gate to your love.

~~ Rumi

Saturday, November 26, 2005


Last night I pulled out some more records. Do you remember:

Little River Band
Grand Funk
Kenny Nolan
KC &The Sunshine Band
SOS Band???

And then some Bob Seger, Earth, Wind & Fire, Barry Manilow (really, I used to LOVE him) and some country (Waylon Jennings, Razzy Bailey, The Judds, Earl Thomas Conley (I was soooooooooo in love with him).

Yes, another music session lasting into the early morning.

Life reverses itself

I have a son that does not live with me. He was missing.

One day-- that's how long the law enforcement agencies will actively look. No more than that, because "they have other things to do," the woman at the police station told me.

Well, okay. . .

But six days later, it's over and everything's fine. Just like that.

My greatest fear, of course, was that he would end up somewhere dead. Though I've been there before, facing the loss of a child--two of my children have been hit by cars; one daughter born prematurely and ended up in the special care unit; then later at two, she's being tested for leukemia; and then there's the time my youngest son was supposed to go to his friend's house after school but he never showed up and we searched for hours and again there's only so much you can do-- it's not like you can go knocking on everybody's door, is it?--I never, ever really want to have to deal with that. What mother would?

Fears exacerbated 'cause it echoes when my brother was missing and ended up dead. Until there's a body, you don't give up hope, but still everyday with no news is crazy (I was going to say "murder" or a "real killer" but those would be really bad puns).

Still I learned just how much my heart could face. More importantly, I've learned that there is so much out of my control-- all I can do is choose my attitude and to trust in God. Trust that there is reason and hold onto my integrity, again like Job, and receive the blessings, the intangible ones.

So this was a hard week but one where I learned, again, what I can choose to be made of.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

My bra size

This man who came into the restaurant the other day asked what it was.
Uhm, WTF??????????


Well, it will not be tragic . Perhaps unhappy but I can live with that.

Monday, November 21, 2005

I think I'm there

Something happened over the weekend that could turn painfully tragic. Numb, at first, but now I'm at some peace with what is and what may become.

I was thinking my state was because of a degree of "awfulizing;" the idea that bad stuff seems to happen to me again and again -- I'm therefore not surprised or moved by it, but I don't think that that's it.

I cried and then let go and what I believe, and so hope, is true is that I'm "there"-- at the point where my heart is expansive and open and accepting.

That I can accept that my situation is sometimes better than that of others, that it is sometimes worse, but no matter what happens, no matter what life brings to me, that I can honor it, like Job, good or bad, with equal grace.


In a full heart there is room for everything, and in an empty heart there is room for nothing. -Antonio Porchia

Sunday, November 20, 2005

Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.

~~Emily Bronte

Friday, November 18, 2005

One of my favorite Joseph Campbell quotes

"Furthermore, we have not even to risk the adventure alone, for the heroes of all time have gone before us. The labyrinth is thoroughly known. We have only to follow the thread of the hero path, and where we we had thought to find an abomination, we shall find a god. And where we had thought to slay another, we shall slay ourselves. Where we had thought to travel outward, we shall come to the center of our own existence. And where we had thought to be alone, we shall be with all the world."


Started exercising. Will pick up jogging again next week. I usually wear a 3/4 but I'm pushing the farther end of a 5/6. Such a fine line between "bootylicious" and simply "lots of booty."


The other night at work, this man left me a five-dollar tip.

I supervise and occasionally run the register. Whenever people do take-outs, sometimes they don't take an extra container they're entitled to. I always suggest they do but this man told me no.

"I told you 'no' the last time you told me about it too," he said.

I suggested what he might put in it.

He said "No."

I countered with another suggestion.

Again he said "no."

This continued up to the point where I put his change on the counter.

He had been sorting through the money in his hand and he pushed a $5 bill across the counter to me. It was, he said, 'cause I argued with him.


If only I had $5 for everytime I've argued with a man!


Crying uncle.

I can't write every day and I don't believe I'm a novelist. I love the short story form, and especially flash. I should accept this for now. I can try a novel later, like when I'm 60 or something.


This lady put an ad in the paper looking for someone to help her find "Gwendolyn Joyce Mintz." My son, who's looking for a job, saw it in the personal section of the classifieds of our city newspaper.

Turns out she wants me to make her a bear 'cause she'd read about me and my bears previously.

I'm not easy to get hold of. I take the hermit thing to an extreme, but it was my survival technique growing up in the household I did. I run or I hide-- either way, I can't be touched. If I can't be found or caught, then I can't get hurt.

Worked when I was a child, but I wonder, now, how many opportunities I may have missed out on because I keep running and/or hiding. Perhaps it's time to lay this "skill" to rest.


Going to contact the editor of an online journal I met at the reading. Hoping this will get me a reading in Washington, D.C. next year.

I'm trying for one every month. April's booked. 11 to go.

** Correction. Only 10 months to cover 'cause Didi had invited me to read for Mipoesias again, this time in Illinois (hopefully Chicago!)

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

I hope you will go out and let stories happen to you and that you will work them, water them with your blood and tears and your laughter till they bloom, till you yourself burst into bloom.

~~Clarissa Pinkola Estes

I'm going to be in the bookstores!

Well, Hastings to begin with. The book manager has agreed to carry the mug (available from with my flash "She Follows."

Am working on an independent bookstore, have just got the name and number for the regional buyer for Barnes and Noble and I'm headed to the bookstore at my alma mater later today.

Thought the writing life was about sitting in a chair, but I'm finding that it's an awful lot of legwork as well.

(and thanks to Kathy Fish, for the idea)

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

Kathy Fish

is a cool woman and fascinating writer. Talked to her yesterday and she made me laugh and laugh. Almost an hour on the phone? Felt like minutes-- we could have gone on and on. . . .

One day she'll have a website, until then go here:

Mrs. Fish

You can also google her.

Read and envy and admire her!!

(And someone should tell this person that I AM the president of the Kathy Fish fan club)

Insolent Rudder

one of my stories is gonna be in it when it reemerges. Cool.

Okay, back to the real world. . .

Miami was wonderful. Possibility that I can turn that reading into three more. Met the woman who schedules readers for the Miami International Book Fair, happening this weekend. Of course, I'm gonna follow that lead 'cause I'd loooooooove to read at the fair next year.

Not a 'ghetto' trip. So nice to not worry about anything-- just enjoy, enjoy.
Cuban men are gorgeous, I must note. Some, muy muy mucho;-)

Took pictures but I left my camera in the cab! And the ATM kept my debit card. I've got to call somebody about that, uhm, like today!!

Books & Books is a gorgeous bookstore and classy as well.

Did not want to go home but I knew I had to-- there were those two sinks of dishes to be washed that my children had waiting for me;-p

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

That Will Smith song

The one about Miami, in my head, in my head.

Some last minute details to take care of and I'm set. Will be in absentia for days. I'm ready for that.

Monday, November 07, 2005

New story up

"The Father of The Bride" in the November issue of Long Story Short. Look under "Odds 'n Ends."

I was going to be Bob's wench this weekend,

but I didn't make it to the Renaissance Craftfaire. He has a show and he wanted me to take part in it; the costume sounded really cool and sexy (a bustiere and corset to begin with) but I got tied up with some other stuff.

Still, Bob Diven is multi-talented. He performs comedy (musically), he writes, he acts, and he's amazing visual artist as well.
(We've decided he suffers from CDD (Caucasian Dancing Disorder) -- we'll never hit the dance floor again, ha!--but I won't hold that against him)

Go here to his new website :Bob
Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.

~~Henry David Thoreau

Friday, November 04, 2005

Joseph German

is a cool guy. Funny. Wonderful poet, too.



Sarah stopped playing
and I looked up as if
the moon was screaming from the top floor
in the red vacuum of alpine rescue ladders,
and somebody opened the window, I thought
so I could dream Jacob's dream, so I could breath
like smiling dalmations on the long folded back
of all our desperate fire engines. Sarah stopped
the music, and all my bells and whistles
hid between a fold of smoke and red search-lights,
playing go fetch with english pace-makers like
desperate dalmations as the moon rolled by.
She stopped and I watched the concert ladders fold
back into lunar vacuums of ivory and smoke
as the stoplights began to scream, english organized
in the breathless telescope of my ebony window
where the dream dalmations howl. The moon rock
stopped as silence poured

golden over the red, golden on the light, golden
down the pillar at the base of Jacob's vow.
She prayed, a long quiet into the smiling vacuum.
Sarah, she prayed bells. She sang Jesus is the rock
and he rolls my blues away.

This time next week,

I'll be hanging out in Miami.

Got window seats on the plane too and 'cause I have to fly to Phoenix first (I don't understand why America West continually makes me fly west before flying me east, but—) I will get to spend some time with my bestest friend Carrie.


Thursday, November 03, 2005

Madonna's 15 minutes aren't up yet?

Can someone please check the clock?


Read Poor Mojo's this week

No, I'm not in it ;-) but it's (still) a good issue.

Kidding. Really, though, it is.


November 1 was also the deadline for a chapbook contest. Because those contests for fiction are so few and very far between, I really wanted to enter this one.


Still on track with novel. All giddy, thinking I might just do this. Heh heh.

An open note to the love of my life

Years ago, because in my heart I have always known you existed, I purchased a beautiful heart-shaped frame. It was intended to hold your photograph. I found it the other day when I was clearing out a box of things I had packed away.

I remembered it's purpose. So I cleaned the dust away and polished the glass.

I placed it on the table in my room where it belongs. It's empty right now; just waiting for you to be in the picture.

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Stuff -- writing and otherwise

No acceptances, but no rejections either--ha!

Got the application from Money for Women. Need to get packet together and in the mail ASAP or by Dec. 31, whichever comes first.

Need to go apply for the passport.

Pier 1 has dishes on sale. Have no available credit so I can't buy online. Means I gotta go into the store. Yikes! I'll leave with more candles 'cause I can't resist. No, really, I can't. I just can't.

So, Nov. 1 came and went and I didn't get this story to a contest. Oh well. Next.

Was going to buy a Foreigner hits compilation cd but it didn't have "Dirty White Boy" or "Waiting For A Girl Like You" on it. How can that be? But I got the one by .38 Special and I'm pondering Lynard Skynard and the one from Chicago with every song I love esp. "Color My World" and "You Are Not Alone" is my very next purchase.

I wish the heat in my house were electric. Brrr, it's getting colder. Even the ducks at the university pond were all tucked in.

Yes, I wrote

Started to get the novel on paper. For a year now I've been sorting through ideas and character names and storylines. Still no definitive stuff-- the process is pretty fluid, isn't it? -- but I wrote. I began. And I have plans to do it again today.

The agent that wrote that book "The First Five Pages" also wrote a book that proposes that if you really know your character, then the work will unfold in "authentic" ways. So tonight I'm going to be answering questions about and talking to my character and getting to know her.

The problem I had with the two previous novels I wrote, and I've read that this is a common thing, is that the work was too autobiographical.

My character Ada from "The Teacher" shares characteristics with me, but she's not me, nor am I, her.

Another problem was that I was trying to reorchestrate my life through fiction. Make the story go the way I wanted it to go rather than accept what was.

Bu I've learned. I am willing to believe that I am here to channel something, something important and in the form of a novel ['cause that's what several keep asking me for ;-)]

If it's to be, it will. (Well, also if I sit my butt in the chair and write!)

The Miami Reading at Books & Books

If you're in Florida next week--

Friday, November 11, Gables
Books & Books and MiPOesias Revista Literaria bring you some of our best and brightest literary talents. Join David Trinidad, Nick Carbo, Terri Carrion, Reb Livingston, Jenni Russell, Michael Hettich, Bruce Covey, Gwendolyn Joyce Mintz, Gianmarc Manzione, Howard Camner, Barbra Nightingale, Rita Maria Martinez and Birdie Jaworski for a series of readings from their work. Jack Anders serves as the master of ceremonies. 8pm
Live Music in the Courtyard: Singer-Songwriter Bill Cruz, 7-11pm

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

The first day of the rest of my (writing) life

So it's November 1st and I need to start a novel, don't I?

On my way -- I'm ready to write some-- not sure how much but that's okay.

I can see I'm growing as a writer 'cause I'm allowing myself some things I never allowed before.
Like I don't need to know the whole story, that the novel can unfold and I can be awed and confused and delighted by it as it moves me along. And I plan to revise. And write every day. All very new to me.

I bought a book last night at Hastings about developing ideas and I'm going to work through it. Going to go back to get that book about writing a "breakout" novel and I'm going to hand over $35 for another writing book I've been looking at. I'm willing to learn, to try techniques that help me stretch. Which alone--that I don't know everything and that that can be okay-- is a huge step for me.

Anyway, I'm going go write now. It's the first day of the rest of my writing life and I'm not concerned about day five or fifteen. Right now, I'm ready and that's more than enough.

Open Mouth, Insert Foot

HA! I'm such a doof sometimes. My boss refused my resignation and she told me that I'd requested more hours. And I did ask that, for two weeks, I work crazy hours + overtime but I thought I'd asked in a time frame so that this first week of November I'd be working less. Evidently I didn't.

"You said you needed the extra money," my boss reminded me. She added that my bookshelves had been on sale and that I had wanted money for the trip to Miami next week and then it all came back to me.

I've been tired and stressed so I forgot.

So indignant I was! What a dunce I can be!

Anyway, all is well on the job front. My hours will be cut, I'll supervise part-time and waitress part-time. Cool, cool, cool.

Kudos to Eddie for being such a wonderful boss.