I had dinner with a friend of mine, that I've known for over 30 years. I should have married him, of course when the possibility was there, but oh well.
He wondered outloud what it would take for me to get settled and do my work. He's concerned that I'll always be bouncing around and never accomplish what I want.
He thinks I should pick one thing and just do it.
I used to think the same thing, but I can't just pick one thing. I pick one and my heart starts crying to do another. The truth: I want to write and eventually get back to the filmmaking and I want to continue to act (and yes, maybe even a movie playing Whoopi's daughter/sister or something) and do the comedy and I hope to knit and quilt along the way. I want to carve out the time to further the painting and the photography and somehow become an adequate piano player.
My friend doesn't think it's possible to do justice to them all, but I disagree.
I just need to decide where I'll live and get organized. [Oh, stop laughing-- I'm making that decision right now. Maybe I will stay in New Mexico. Maybe not. I'll have made up my mind by Jan 1, 2008; I've got some time;-)]
Sometimes it looks like I'm not making progess-- that I'm just a ball in a pinball game bouncing off here and there, but something inside me assures me that I'm getting there.
It may look a little crazy and chaotic--hell, it may very well be crazy and chaotic--but I'm not worried.
I've come to accept that my path will not be linear (ha!) but it is now filled with so much love and laughter and peace that I'll take it the way it comes. Nothing less.
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