Monday, January 09, 2006

I walked out of the UPS store and almost ran into a guy I used to have a relationship with. He was helping someone jump a car battery and he had just straightened up from leaning into the car.

I was about to say his name, but recalled that we just didn't have a relationship-- we had a sometimes very stormy relationship. When it was nice between us, it was nice, but when it wasn't . . .

let's just say DRAMA.

He didn't notice me or at least he didn't stop me as I quickly walked away.

I saw him again a week later. But I was inside a business, looking out the window and he was going across a parking lot.

I saw him yesterday in the grocery store. My first thought was to keep walking past (he was looking at something in the aisle) but I was suddenly seeing him after not for about eight years. There was a reason: there was something I needed to tell him.

"I'm sorry," I said. "For the bad things I did."

He shook his head. "You don't have to--"

"Oh, yes, I do," I told him. "This is the third time I've seen you recently and Life is trying to help me do something and that's apologize for the unkind way I treated you."

(No need to drag up past s**t, but one of the annoying things I did: I HAD TO DISCUSS our relationship ten minutes before the television show that he'd spent the last 50 minutes watching was going to end. Needless to say, he doesn't know the outcome.)

He nodded his head slowly. "I probably need to make some apologies of my own," he said. "I didn't treat you very well."

[No, you didn't, I wanted to tell him, but decided that I really shouldn't go there;-)]

"It doesn't matter. I just want to clear this."

He smiled. Yes, that smile that used to make my heart melt.

I smiled in return.

It was nice to be in his company again, if only to set myself free.

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